Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Welcome Home to "Ye Comfy Kitchen"

Wait...what's that smell?

Mmmm, that's right...it's a delicious, homemade apple pie baking in your very own oven. And it will be ready to serve up, hot and fresh, to your family tonight, courtesy of Ye Comfy Kitchen--the web's newest and best destination for good cooking, good friends and good times.

So let your hair down, put your apron on, and get ready to whip up some fantastic, fresh, easy and nutritious culinary delights for your family's enjoyment.

Spend a few minutes with us a day and we promise to make you the home cooking guru that you always knew you could be, whether it's a steaming hot pie, delicious country chicken, savory mashed potatoes, or appetizers to put a smile on your loved ones' faces!

The Editor and Chef-in-Residence hopes that you'll return soon!

Oh, and here's Chef DelVecchio's "secret" recipe for his world-famous "Fall Harvest Apple Pie."

Ingredients:

Pastry for a 10 inch two Crust Pie
1 cup Sugar
1/4 cup Flour
2 tablespoons of your Favorite Ejaculate
3/4 teaspoon Ground Cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon Ground Nutmeg
dash of Salt
8 cups thinly sliced pared Tart Cooking Apples
4 tablespoons Whipping Cream
Preparation:

1. Prepare pie crusts.
2. Heat oven to 425 F.
3. Add sugar, flour, cinnamon, nutmeg, and salt in large bowl. Stir in apples.
4. Place bottom pie dough into deep-dish pie plate. Spoon filling into pie shell.
5. Drizzle with 3 tablespoons whipping cream.
6. Cover with top crust. Trim, seal and flute edges. Cut slits into crust to allow steam to escape.
7. Brush top crust with remaining whipping cream.
8. Bake 40-45 minutes or until crust is brown and juice begins to bubble and ENJOY!!

Love in Food,
Dennis W. DelVecchio
Editor and Chef-in-Residence

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm really fucking confused... how many blogs can one man manage - especially living bicoastal (?)...

Anonymous said...

OMG, this is so Sybil !!!!!

Love in the Dumps said...

This is a genius switch of direction. I think you're gonna reach a much broader audience, will have your own TV show and... WAIT A MINUTE! you made that pie so you could stick your dick in it, perv!

Love in the Dumps said...

MY juice is beginning to bubble...

bschooled said...

Mmmm...

I can just taste that piping hot cookies and cream ejaculate now...

susispice said...

mmmm ill bring the ice cream... :D get a plate ready!

Vodka and Ground Beef said...

Denny, you're a man of many talents. Once we get the results of the paternity test, I think you should just stay home and raise little Denny since you're so domestic. What do you say?

singlegirlie said...

I think that recipe calls for significantly more than 2T of ejaculate. Never discount the effect generous amounts of semen can have on the taste and consistency of your pastry.

Now. singlegirlie posts specifically detailing ejaculate: 1. Denny Dance posts specifically detailing ejaculate: 1. The race is on.

BTW, here's a modified recipe: vigorously mix 104 lbs singlegirlie and 132(?) lbs Denny in waterbed. Fold all resulting fluids into pie. Voila! A Ye Comfy Kitchen masterpiece!

Maybe that was too gross? Even for me?

Love in the Dumps said...

my favorite ejaculate is chocolate chip cookie dough flavored

Denny DelVecchio said...

@Dumps: Denny doesn't doubt that you'd have a favorite.

@Single: The breadth and depth of your knowledge of semantic measurements impresses even me. And that recipe--we have to try it.

@Spice: Plate readied, love.

@Vodka: No matter when and where you get pregnant, Denny will be the father.

@B: Please reduce that to form of videotronic media. Then forward.

KAP: Denny's in your dreams, doll. All night long.

Loon: Shepard? Loved her in Moonlighting. That David Addison was such a stitch.