Regress #29: Hippie Sticks

To all of the flyblown weed-jockeys* out there who think that twirling a fucking stick with two other sticks is a real sport, listen up: 

I understand that, outside of two guitar chords and hackysackosity,  you were not blessed with a traditional set of human coordination skills.

I have come to grips with the fact that even modest grooming is an anathema to your Middle Earthian sub-culture mores.

I realize that Phish, The Grateful Dead, Widespread Panic and the Dave Matthews Band are your lamentable barometers of hipness.

And I have the ability to breathe through my mouth, rather than nose, when your Patchouli-addled living carcass whisks past.

But I cannot stand idly by without informing you that the laughter you're hearing when you roll your sticks is not coming from the stoned dancing bears in your head.

It's coming from Denny Dance.

Cordially,
Denny DelVecchio

*In fairness, the fellow in the vid appears to favor songs (and looks) celebrating Jesus to those pimping herb