Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Regress #36: Someone's A Bit Touchy

So I'm at a sizzling hot baby shower for a co-worker, Debbie O'Dell-Brownberry, this morning (pheromones on Mach 10!) and she volunteers her observation that a large number of women at work have gotten pregnant lately.

Naturally, I expect all eyes to drift toward Denny Dance, given my preternatural fertility. Lord knows, although some say the workplace is off limits for discussions of carnality, I treat the topic like a liver at a frat party.

The next thing I know, Debs says "there must be something in the water around here."

Naturally, I replied "like what, my balls?"

I was then rudely sent home by Easy Ed Verhowski (who I have a bit of a history with).  Does anyone out there know what an unpaid suspension pending formal termination proceedings means?

I don't either.  I hate that Orwellian HR Officespeak that's all the rage today.

So was Denny totally, completely, unambiguously 100% in the right today?

I'll take your silence as a healthy, empathetic affirmation.

Confident,
Denny DelVecchio

4 comments:

Love in the Dumps said...

Maybe because the visual is so visceral. As in, you go for a nice drink of water and you get these chunky glue-bits instead. Then suddenly, you self tester turns pink and you're popping out little Dennys, because only Denny would unload in the watercooler, prankster that he is.

Denny DelVecchio said...

I would never befoul a public drinking receptacle.

Wait, was someone being mean to me first?

singlegirlie said...

Semen in the water at work? Why the hell are those bitches douching at the office?

A jolly fun site, my boy. Thanks to LITD for introducing us. Your picture beats mine hands down.

Denny DelVecchio said...

Welcome single.

I am a handsome devil, aren't I?