I'm so glad that I can finally introduce you to my cool, hastily-drawn French family.
Meet Henri, Sophie, Jean-Luc and Thérèse DelVecchio. They're the greatest.
What? Hiding them from you?
Au contraire, mon ami. Denny just needed to wait until the right time to tell you.
I had to make sure that you'd be truly happy for us--without a hint of the cankered jealousy that you unfurled upon learning of the white hot groin-vacation I enjoyed with your sister-in-law at the 2005 North Mesa Clogger's Retreat.
Anyway, I'm off to engorge myself in Sophie's trademark grenouille aubergine, followed by a spongebath from the beguiling Thérèse, who, by the way, just finished her first year at Sarbonne. (That's Denny's college girl!)
Merci Beaucoup,
Denny DelVecchio
