Friday, June 24, 2011
Advance #80: Hot Summer Spanktacular
The Banana Hammock is snugly in place. Gunther Loverman is spitting and/or swallowing fat beats anew from my cassette tape player. And your staid, sexless existence is about to be magnificently betrayed by the Empresario of Girth.
Welcome to DelVecchonia, your new home planet. I hope that you stay awhile.
Pour Some Out: Dr. Dre quietly passes 1,000th simile mark.
Ample-bosomed pop starlet in retainer robustly jacked off to.
Report: Stock you bought last year fails to beat 10 Year Lipper Average.
Source: "Crazy" Waukesha Dad realizes boyhood dream of sticking head out of limo sunroof.
Cocaine vehemently denies abusing celebrity.
Straight actor finally marries beard.
Exclusive: Tommy John becomes Billionaire on back of pitchers' ruined elbows.
My Giant: Director's Cut Redbox's first 75 cent movie.
Finger-wagging Lance Armstrong to Federal investigators: "I DIDN'T USE STEROIDS . . . . today."
It's not just my large penis anymore,