Unlike his Hammerian counterpart, Billy Squier was at the apex of his artistic game when he rolled out the hateful abomination (and cruel jab at the human condition) that was Rock Me Tonite.
To say that it was bad is like saying that Hammer's speedo, below, was a touch bulgy. Like saying that my eyebrows are just a bit unified. Like saying that Jessie Spano was only slightly excited.
No, this video was a full, unabashed assault on our collective eyes, ears and Super-ego barriers on garishness and poor taste. It makes a 1980s Jason Alexander-fronted McDonald's ad seem like a back room Yeah Yeah Yeahs show.
In a sad afterword, Mr. Squier now lives penniless and alone in a Venice Beach camper van, while working gratis as a special assistant creative consultant on Katy Perry's new project, now tentatively entitled Russell Brand is F-ing Me (and my career).
Your best bud,
Denny DelVecchio
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